Observing your thoughts, the way you act, and the choices that you make, is a skill, even an art, and it yields a very strange journey.  Be prepared for the unexpected. In a nutshell, my own personal experience and understanding of self-observation looks something like this:

1. First, we begin to glean that there is actually something to observe.  This takes about 20 years.
2. We become curious and observe for one second.  We are so freaked by what we observe that we retreat and medicate for at least 10 years.
3. We still desire to evolve. After decades of attending self-help workshops, we realize that our spiritual development requires that we observe.
4. We resolve to observe, and begin the process anew.
5. Through observation, we discover we must un-do everything we learned in our New Age workshops.
6. Through observation, we discover we must give up our fantasies, our beliefs, our opinions, even our affirmations.
7. We enter a state of confusion and total disorientation.
8. We fall into despair, stay there for a while, and wallow.
9. We blame and curse the people, the earth plane, the game, the whole enchilada.
10. We realize we’ve stopped observing.
11. We resolve to observe again. It’s not so bad this time.
12. We observe our thought patterns when we want to repeat steps 8 and 9.
13. We observe that by observation we can zap those thought patterns that have held us by the throat for the over 50 years we’ve been alive on this planet. That feels good. It feels like power. We like it.
14. We begin to look forward to those old thought patterns returning so we can fine-tune our zapping powers and see what else we will discover. We happily accept that we are very powerful.
15. Whatever is in the moment, we observe it’s our choice how we play. As long as we are observing, we will always have a choice.
16. We observe that every next moment is punctuated with uncertainty. Sometimes this observation is pleasant, and sometimes it is unpleasant.  We’re OK with both, because we can see that whatever the present situation, there is always potential and possibility.
17. We discover uncertainty is a very interesting dance partner. It gives us the opportunity to be quite powerful and quite creative.
18. The more we observe, the more we are able to observe, and the more there is to observe.
19. The whole enchilada starts to look a whole lot different.
20. ?

What will you discover when you journey into the realm of observation? I haven’t a clue. I just know this has been my experience. But I can promise you that for anyone who does it, observing will open a very interesting door.  It is perhaps the key to those  famous words inscribed above the Temple of Apollo at Delphi over 3,000 years ago:  Know Thyself.  Who are you?  You’ll find out by observing.

Take a look around at this classroom. Nowhere in the physical universe will you encounter such a rich and diverse array of physical forms, both natural and made by the human hand. Everywhere you look there is physical form: the paper you are reading, your computer, the chair you are sitting on, the clothes you are wearing, the food you eat, the house you live in, the trees outside your door, the river that rushes by in the woods, the birds in the sky, the bugs under your feet. All is form on planet Earth.

One thing we know about form is that it does not last. Whether it is a piece of chocolate, our physical bodies, the Sangre de Cristo mountains, or the Earth planet itself, all physical form eventually dissolves, dies, disappears.  That is the nature of the physical universe, and this causes fear. The impermanence of earthly life and the uncertainty of life cause survival fears in all humans.  

Part of our challenge, then, is this: can we learn to accept the impermanence of life? Can we learn to allow the uncertainty which is present in every moment? As we journey through this dimension in a human body that has a fairly short “shelf life”, can we overcome our individual  fears?

A look at our past shows us how difficult this assignment has been and the very slow progress we have made as a species in this area. Under the pressure of fear we’ve made poor choices. We continue to spend our energies trying to control and dominate our lives and each other, caught in the illusion that this is the way out of having to deal with the earth lessons of impermanence and uncertainty. We give up the direction our hearts would take us for the illusion of security in a dimension that by its very nature is insecure. Around and around like squirrels in a cage we go, century after century, hedging the very thing we came here to learn.  Our evolution depends upon our willingness to do the inner work required to respond to fear consciously. Overcoming fear is the journey.